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Ensign Phoebe Ocano
I still can't understand what exactly happened to me over the last few months. The counseling teams on the starbase tried their best to persuade, convince, and explain to me that everything I thought had happened on the Ares had been merely a hallucination, and one that took place over a couple of hours, before the ship was destroyed. Apparently the Breen have that kind of technology. But it all seems so real. How can I take that part of my life and just undo it? My mind doesn't work that way. I feel like I don't even know for sure who died there, and how - and if the friends I made were even real people.
At any rate, I'm glad to be here. Somehow, a station on a planet seems more substantial, more real. When I got here, I spent almost all my few remaining days of leave outdoors. It's a beautiful place. I lay on a rock on the edge of the lake and just thought, and slept, and thought. If the last few months I remember were just a hallucination a few hours long, those few hours are going to take years for me to figure out. I think I may have the chance to do so here, though.
I was starting to get my feel for the buildings they've built here: the Science Tower is really well-equipped, and the Main Operations building is a little intimidating, but I suppose it will stop feeling like the Principal's Office eventually. Facilities Management is where I'll probably be spending most of my time, and the other people I've met there are really nice. I miss my quarters in the residences already, and miss the food. They have some really good cooks.
Anyway, I suppose the takeaway is that I'm already homesick, even though I've only been on the outpost for a week or so, and only been away a few days. I hope we're able to finish this mission and recover this ship quickly, and then get back home and relax.
Home - it's been a while since I've felt that I had one. It's a nice feeling.